May 2012
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Every time I remember that I’m seeing RHCP in little less than a month, I start to lose my breath.
I’ll be crying on the day, mark my words.
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Seeing Simon Amstell in Oxford in 7 hours, whaaaaaat ;D
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Russell: A house of horror! If you had a house that was full of horror, why on EARTH would you put a train through it!? Running in it, making stops off at some of the things you would be anxious to conceal like skelingtons made of luminousnes!
Matt: They're rubbish aren't they, ghost rides?
Russell: Rubbish! Absoloute rubbish.
Matt: I went on one once it said on the wall "It will tear your soul apart" right.
Russell: AHAHAHAHA!
Matt: I went on it. It was the most, it was badly kept
Russell: It was badly kept!
Matt: They hadn't even bothered with it. There was bits of it where they'd left the lights on in bits and with the lights on it's rubbish. It goes 'mewwwww!!! mrewwwww!!!' as you rattle through.
Russell: Was that the noise of the skellingtons or was that the nose of the train?
Matt: No it goes, it has like an alarm noise you know what it is, you know the noise?
Russell: 'rrreewww dingalingalingalingalingalingaaaaa'.
Matt: Yeah, that noise.
Russell: 'Dingalingalingaaa'!
Matt: No, not that. Have you ever left your house? And then guess what, at the end of the, at the last minute as you went through the last set of double doors, bang into the daylight.
Russell: Yeah...
Matt: It said REM on the wall.
Russell: REM! That's nothing to do with anything! RIP maybe!
Matt: But REM?
Russell: Was it a reference to the band REM?
Matt: Well it looked like it...
Russell: Or Rapid Eye Movement?
Matt: Well it was REM written in sort of drippy red blood paint.
Russell: REM!!! [in haunting voice]
Matt: And then when I got out.
Russell [in haunting voice] What will Michael Stipe do next!!??
Matt: Then I got out and I laughed about the fact that it said it will tear your soul apart. I then started to think maybe it will.
Russell: Yeah maybe.
Matt: Yeah maybe in a few months.
Russell: Maybe it's doing it in a subtle way. Hows your soul feeling lately?
Matt: I don't... I don't know if I've got one.
Russell: It's been shattered and torn to shreds by REM!
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I’ve had the same earring in my ear since I was about 14 because I can’t get it out..then I got used to it and didn’t want it out.
It’s never been gunky and stuff though.
Well that was a story worth telling; don’t you feel like you’re friends with me now?
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cosmo tip #252
expertcosmotips:
why have 1 peen in your ass when you can have 5
why did i laugh
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Watchvideohall:
The old woman had me in tears… “WOW… eehhhhhYEEEEAAAHHH”
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I cannae breathe
Cats aren’t actually that awesome; they’ve become so overrated now, like calm down.
Maybe cause I’ve never had a cat? I mean, I’ve been around cats many times, and some are cute as ffffuuuuuu—, and I can even mew just like one, but they’re not all that.
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cosmo tip #249
expertcosmotips:
when hes having sex with you, shout out your own name instead of his.
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plottwist:
what if those “you’ve just won a giftcard/laptop/big money” things were actually real instead of scams and for years we’ve just been denying free gifts and somewhere in the world someone is like crying behind their computer screen whispering why won’t you just let me do nice things
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omg there’s a teacher at the school my mum helps at called Mr Dix and I’m crying.
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What happens if you enter your own name into Hell’s Correspondence (Jigoku Shoujo) or the Death Note..
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Earlier, I dreamt that I was pregnant but was told no babies before uni’s over, but I was already like 3 months gone. It was sad.
Then I woke up broody once again.
I bet it was from watching that woman on telly beg her mum for pain relief while in labour.
Why does watching pain make me broody.
Why.
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Soulchild’s remix of Gorillaz’s song 19-2000 is bringing back more memories than the original.
Makes me think of summerrrrrrr <3
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*get excited about making milkshake for about a day*
*one sip = tummyache*
How did this happen.
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totallytotalprovidence:
dapper—dandy replied to your post: Someone distact me from revision
Look! Over there! Robert Downey Jr!
The thing about this is, almost every direction I look in my room, there is some sort of representation of Robert Downey Jr.
^ This made me laugh out loud.
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When looking up how many countries are in Africa…
How is that even a question?!
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Why the fuck have I spent £3.98 on a milkshake from Shakeaway that I could make myself?!?
Think about it though, this applies to everyone, why not just make them yourselves?
Ice cream, milk, ingredients, BAM!
£3.98, my ass…
11 year olds today: omg i luhv smokin pot omfg i get drunk off lyke my moms wine coolers lol sometimes i take an extra vitamin in the morning so i can get that high lol! on tumblr i reblog sex because unfff me and my boyfriend fuck almost twice a day. im a bad bitch lol one time my mom yelled at me because she said i cant be bringin boys up to my room so i said FUCK YOU lol i do what i want yolo!!
me when I was 11: omg did i forget to feed my neopet this morning
squiddlebitch:
why do so many people think theyre special for loving food and sleeping
those arent even optional things or interests you literally are required to do both of those to stay alive
My mum says I’m special for breathing.